In the past, the two of us experienced the hopelessness and disconnect that occur when you don't feel heard or understood. In our previous relationships, we did not yet have the tools we have now, and so we ended up blaming, shaming, "right fighting", avoiding, and eventually losing the heart connection. After each going through a painful divorce, and spending years on the personal journey of finding a different way, we learned the value of self love. Neither of us had role models for what a healthy intimate relationship looks like, so we sought to figure that out for ourselves. Prior to meeting each other, we studied mindfulness/meditation, spirituality, Compassionate Communication (NVC), among other practices, and found mentors to guide us on this path of self discovery. We have since practiced using these skills in each encounter and relationship in our lives, which at times, has been messy and full of trial and error, as well as authentic connection.
Since coming together, we have built (and continue to build) a relationship based on mutuality, trust, and encouragement. We are creating a family where we empathize with each other's full range of emotions, understanding that everyone's voice matters. As a result, we experience being more comfortable in our own skin and appreciated in the family- we are all on the same team. This leads to a sense of more ease, compassion, and connection as we interact on the daily. Of course, there are moments (when we're tired, hungry, or upset) that we lapse into old behaviors. However, each day is an opportunity to practice a way of being that aligns with our core values.